a short, incomplete list of things that have been said since i realized i was miscarrying
“I’m bleeding!”
“I’m so scared.”
“It’s probably a UTI, but I would go to the ER anyway just to be sure.”
“No need to go to the dark scary place yet, there are other plausible reasons you are bleeding so hang tight while we run tests.”
“It usually takes about 90-minutes to get the results back.”
“Hi I am just wondering when my wife and I will get some answers, it has been over 90-minutes.”
“We detected no fetal heartbeat. This is what we call a missed miscarriage.”
“I just never considered this could happen.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry you are going through this.”
“I’m just so sorry.”
“I wish I had something to say other than I’m sorry.”
“Me too.”
“How are you doing?”
“Shitty.”
“I’m sorry.”
“If you need anything, let us know.”
“The dr. doesn’t have time to call today but feel free to send a message in the patient portal.”
“I’ve been bleeding for a week.”
“In that case, we recommend a D&C.”
“If you need anything, let me know.”
“I’m calling to verify if my wife should be in this much pain?”
“I’m so fucking mad that this is happening.”
“The hard part is over now.”
“I’m calling to cancel my D&C, I ended up miscarrying over the weekend.”
“Okay, I’m sorry.”
“You can see here your uterus is empty and it is looking good.”
“You have an outstanding balance, did you want to pay that today?”
“I’m calling to verify if I should still be bleeding this much?”
“It can take 2 to 3 weeks to stop, be patient.”
“I’m sorry that this happened to you.”
“I think I might be going crazy.”
“You’re not.”
“Studies show trying again after miscarriage is usually very successful, so you are welcome to try again. When you are ready, of course.”
“Your mom is worried you won’t experience the joy of pregnancy now.”
“We usually see heightened anxiety in moms that get pregnant again after miscarriage.”
“I am so sick of seeing blood.”
“We don’t consider there to be an underlying problem unless you’ve had 3 miscarriages, that’s how common this is.”
“I’m sorry you had to go through this.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m so very sorry.”
“I am finally done bleeding.”
“I’m sorry.”